Showing the very latest breaking spoof news snippets. You can use the calendar on the right to browse through the most recent breaking news snippets.
Presidunce Biden Liable for Arrest in Finland for Child Assault
"Creepy" Joe at it again. Using his stinky tongue as weapon of slobber, he attacked a terrified Finnish child held by her Mother. Finnish cops demand his tongue be removed as evidence for trial.
written by Trinculoman, 14 July 2023
Protesting Healthcare Workers Warning About Staff Shortages Realize Their Error...
...there's a shortage of nurses inside the hospitals because they're all outside the hospital! D'OH!
written by Stefano M. Stefano, 14 July 2023
Lesbians are Eating Out Less Since Pandemic
When polled, your average pie-gobbling lesbian couple (who were willing to answer such questions) say that yes indeed, they have cut back on desserts out, due to inflation and health reasons mostly.
written by Paul Blake, 13 July 2023
Geraldo Rivera Reveals His Next Gig After Being Kicked Out of Fox
Geraldo mused on his new dream job of hosting weekly TV re-runs of the "Pee Wee Herman" show on LU-LU. He'll provide run-on comments on how each show enlivens the psyche of a burnt-out ex-hippie hack.
written by Trinculoman, 05 July 2023
Governor Newson has a Special Source for his Unique Hair Gel
Thanks to the Gov's close relationship with Tyrant Xi, he gets barrels of his unique hair gel directly from the Chinese source -- the factory which renders boiled UyGhur fat.
written by Trinculoman, 26 June 2023
Some Perspective on Kum Kardashian's Sex News
The significance of K Kardashian's sex life is of the same universal import as that of a flea's fart sitting on a carbuncle on her ass.
written by Trinculoman, 26 June 2023
"Save the Queen" of Dufus Biden's Remark Revealed!
"Queen" remark by Presidunce Biden refered to Braddink Ambiguous, staff Drag Queen of the White House, who recently had an overdose from sniffing too deeply of Flaming RuPaul Essence. Bad trip, Man!
written by Trinculoman, 19 June 2023
Great American Wrongbook
Relaxed American crooner Dean Martin, out fishing with song writers, netted a 6ft green eel. Said Dean, in his relaxed way, 'That's a Moray'. 'Good name for a song,' they said. And so it proved.
written by Joel Kaye, 13 June 2023
Miami, Florida Wants Me (for Donald Trump)
Now sing along (sounds of sirens):
“Miami, Florida wants me.
Looooord I can’t go back there!”
written by Matt Birkenhauer, 11 June 2023
Fat man found innocent by using McDonald's app
A fat New Yorker was found innocent of a dine-n-dash at a much fancier restaurant, proving he was actually at McDonald's, by using the McD's app tracker. "I'm hungry," he told reporters afterwards.
written by Paul Blake, 29 May 2023
Licensed to "shell"
Allegedly, when Sean Connery was down on his luck, he tried selling 007 memorabilia to his sister's daughter. Stirred and unshaken, he created 'niche' marketing.
written by Joel Kaye, 28 May 2023
Raquel Welch Goes Tits Up
Follow The Spoof to keep abreast of any further developments on this front.
written by Vlad D.M. Paylaw, 20 May 2023
Lesbian Magician Poofs Insecure Man's Member
A lesbian magician performing at a show in downtown Detroit was approached by a misogynistic man yelling slurs at her. She responded with an abracadabra as the man's penis shriveled and disappeared.
written by Xavier Fairbanks, 26 April 2023
Blue States Announce New Sexual Harassment Guidelines
A coalition of blue state leaders today announced new sex harassment guidelines. Coalition Chair Seymour Hyman said the new guidelines would no longer require reporting, but there would be grading.
written by harrytrumanmo, 18 April 2023
New Jersey Church Brings Topless Bar to Town
Father Lovetips said today his Church's new topless bar was interviewing. 'Equal in sight of the Divine Almighty', he said. 'But those mighty divine in the eyes of our future customers will do best.'
written by harrytrumanmo, 18 April 2023
Mid-Atlantic Region of U.S. and Unreliable Electric Power: Perfect Together
BGAG (Better Get A Generator) Electric Company of the Mid-Atlantic said it was giving out discount coupons for home generators. At a press session, the CEO, Ida Flee Thisdump, said 'abandon all hope'.
written by harrytrumanmo, 14 April 2023
Bad Behavior? Charming New Jersey Town Will Name Street After You
A charming New Jersey town is distinguished for having the most streets named for its most unsavory residents. Winner was the most reckless and one with the ugliest western Pennsylvania like accent.
written by harrytrumanmo, 14 April 2023
Colonoscopy Award: Central New Jersey Town Wins Honor While Evacuating
A small central New Jersey town with major renovations has now earned "'Best Colonoscopy Prep Town in the U.S.". New eateries cause massive evacuations and pre-colonoscopy preps are no longer needed.
written by harrytrumanmo, 14 April 2023
Health Insurance and Bikini Manufacturer Merge
A merger between a Health Insurance and a Bikini manufacturer has occurred. At a press conference, a reporter asked 'Why?' The answer is 'Our goals are the same--the absolute minimum in coverage'.
written by harrytrumanmo, 14 April 2023
Gunmen Rush in Where American Police Fear to Tread
Research in US reveals: arming any U.S. civilians who desire this is as bad as England's National Health System; and when gunmen rush in, police should too. Doctors in US objected to these findings.
written by harrytrumanmo, 10 April 2023
America's "Fab Four" Begins European Tour in London
Americas 'Fab Four' who have made history with three initials not sure what they mean will land in London at 10 am. Their hit song 'I want to defund, boycott, and disappear Israel' tops the charts.
written by harrytrumanmo, 10 April 2023
Texas Judges Abolish FDA; All American Drugs Now Under Authority of Texas Judges, Proud Boys, and Oath Keepers
Americans again showed their world dominance and 'superiority' in food, drug, and healthcare delivery. All three will now be subject to any Texas judge, or members of the Proud Boys, and Oath Keepers.
written by harrytrumanmo, 10 April 2023
Central New Jersey Residents Flee Home Owners Associations (HOAs)
Residents of the state fled, seeking asylum in Mexico from oppressive leaf blowers, leaking roofs, and broken masonry due to 'untrained people from south of the U.S. border being hired by our HOAs.'
written by harrytrumanmo, 10 April 2023
British Barristers' Heads and American Babies' Bums
England is losing barristers."Wigs decimating our legal profession!" said His Majesty. "My subjects are unrepresented because what Americans use on their babies' bums is on our barristers' heads!"
written by harrytrumanmo, 10 April 2023
Anti-Asian and Anti-Semitic Americans Undergo Neurologic Research
American scientists are awed today by brain research on anti-semites and anti-Asian individuals. Their pea-sized brains when removed, showed no functional neurological differences than when present.
written by harrytrumanmo, 10 April 2023
American Scientists Discover Why U.S. Doctors Obtunded by National Health System
US MDs form thrombi or blood clots hearing 'national health system'. Circulatory studies and M.R.I.s of American doctors' brains show clots in the vessels leading to their brains when they hear 'NHS'.
written by harrytrumanmo, 10 April 2023
Scientists Discover Reason for America's Avaricious and Rapacious Healthcare "Non"-System
USA health 'non' system headed for cure. Tres or T. difficile--found in fecal samples of U.S. M.D.'s, hospital executives, and insurers-- causes severe greed, blindness to suffering of public.
written by harrytrumanmo, 10 April 2023
American Lesbians and Federal, State Public Employee Unions Unite
Lotta Goldbricking, leader, and New Jersey representative of the Federal and State Employees Unions said, "Our strength united is because of the strongest thing we have in common: We don't do dick."
written by harrytrumanmo, 09 April 2023
New Jersey Urologists and U.S. Customs Cretins Don't Do England
Returning from U.K., man asked by US Cretins: Anything to declare? He said: "Brought back 'Spotted Dick' from recent visit to London." He was quarantined, then rushed to his urologist for treatment.
written by harrytrumanmo, 09 April 2023
New Jerseys's Doctors' Office Staffs and Community Hospital Receptionists Win Rudeness and Lowest IQ Competiton
No IQs, Rudeness: staffs of NJ M.D.'s offices and hospital receptionists. Waking up patients: rude, early calls, pronouncing "gastertrologist" for "gastroenterologist" and "prostrate" for "prostate"!
written by harrytrumanmo, 09 April 2023
Recession or Depression? London School of Economics in Uproar over Definitions
Is it a Recession or a Depression? Fierce debate, warring camps until Dr. Quantitative Thievery solved the problem today:
"If you lose your job, it's a recession. If I lose mine it's a depression."
written by harrytrumanmo, 09 April 2023
Ninety-nine Year Old Woman Jumps from her from Twenty-Story Manhattan Building
A 99 year old woman jumped from her 20 story building. Widowed and overwhelmed by bills, out the window she went. Next morning, struggling in bushes below her first-floor apartment, she was found
written by harrytrumanmo, 09 April 2023
U.S.A.'s New Medicare Advantage Plans Produce a Great Opportunity
U.S.A.'s Medicare Advantage Plans have produced a great opportunity: Insurers charge the elderly loads of money, provide little, and hugely overcharge the government.
Advantage: Insurance Companies
written by harrytrumanmo, 07 April 2023
Non-Toxic Site Discovered in New Jersey: Scientists Shocked!
U.S. scientists are shocked today to find a square foot of New Jersey land that has no toxic waste. Known for the most toxic sites in the U.S., it may lose first place standing as #! Super Fund Site.
written by harrytrumanmo, 07 April 2023
Doctors in United States Test for Most Critical Reflex
American doctors now can assess a patient's health completely with one key clinical indicator. Patients cross their legs, and when the doctor taps a knee, their wallets fly out of their back pockets.
written by harrytrumanmo, 07 April 2023
American Doctors Respond Like Pavlov's Dog
M.D.s. in the U.S. were hooked up to test their responses. When they heard "NHS," they salivated, and said, "But my English aunt has Stage 4 cancer--she's been on the NHS waiting list for 6 months!"
written by harrytrumanmo, 07 April 2023
A Quippet Snippet
Its been over 10 years since I've written a snippet
Thats a lifetime in doggie years
but this ones really just a short quippet
and I hope it doesn't just bring you to tears......
written by rfreed, 03 April 2023
Snippet On Demand
Here is a snippet for those who want it
I not above trying to flaunt it
So now you can stop your demanding snit
Just remember you asked for it.
(I didn't guarantee it would be a good one.)
written by rfreed, 03 April 2023
In Future News; Climate Change Continues To Re-Shape World's Coastlines...
...In a related story, people living in Wyoming are having a great time swimming with herds of dolphins!
written by Stefano M. Stefano, 20 February 2023
Thousands Flee Burning Buildings, Crumbling Streets, and Dozens Of Automobile Accidents...
...after Godzilla accidentally stubbed his toe against the Akashi Kaikyo Bridge.
written by Stefano M. Stefano, 20 February 2023
Macy's Reject's China's Parade Balloon Proposal
Macy's Department Stores has rejected China's latest attempt to enter a Balloon in their famous Thanksgiving Day Parade. "We're sorry but "Spy Balloon" does not fit with this year's holiday theme."
written by Adam Click, 04 February 2023
Remember The Groundhogs That Served Our Country
For Groundhog's Day: When you see a groundhog today, look him straight in the eye, smile, shake his hand, and thank him for his service to our country.
written by MauryLevine, 02 February 2023
Third man dies after being prescribed Miracle cure.
Three people have now known to have died after being prescribed the miracle cure from Doctors in the UK. It has now been banned in Britain and has been replaced by Paracetamol.
written by Glen Jacobs, 30 January 2023
Putin's Body Double Demands Raise
Putin's body double is demanding a raise before making anymore appearances. This is convenient for the now dead Putin as he is unable to attend events in person.
written by JinoLeFeeto, 21 January 2023
Queen Elizabeth's Pyramid Nearing Completion
"Sudan was under British control at the time of the late Queen's ascension to the throne", read a statement from Khartoum, "so it is only fitting that we honour her in a traditional manner".
written by Vlad D.M. Paylaw, 16 January 2023
A Punchline
A Punchline walks into a bar ...
Behind the bar are a blue tongue, a rabid lemur, and a cunning linguist.
They all ask, "What'll it be?"
The Punchline says, "You."
written by Ana Sian, 29 December 2022
Connery named People Magazine "Sexiest Man Dead!"
People reps stated that the dead community is under-represented. Poll shows 75 percent of women think Connery is STILL getting sexier!
written by HershelW, 25 December 2022
A Joke
A Joke walks into a bar ...
Behind the bar are a priest, a rabbi, and a duck.
They all quack, "What'll it be?"
The Joke says, "You."
written by Ana Sian, 24 December 2022
Good and Evil united
Santa and Satan have revealed mental health issues to SKI/notreallyseriousnews
" Being a Saint or being a Monster ...it's like..a you end up hated on Socials anyway"
written by Elladave, 11 December 2022
Congress to Investigate Taylor Swift Ticketmaster Disaster
United States Congress formed a committee to look into the Taylor Swift Ticketmaster issue. Congress members are doing this in hopes of getting free Taylor Swift tickets.
written by MauryLevine, 23 November 2022
