Should the Russian Wagner mercenary group surrender weapons to Putin?

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Tuesday, 27 June 2023

image for Should the Russian Wagner mercenary group surrender weapons to Putin?
"And save your flak jackets."

No! No! Please don’t do it, Wagner Group. You’re going to end up at the receiving end of those weapons. Bet your bottom dollar. Or if you do surrender the guns, keep the bullets, or rockets, or the missiles, and a wheel from each tank and the tail rotor blade of any helicopter.

Okay, if you do that, you may survive. Also, get into civilian clothes, shave, get haircuts, and locate your passports. You could live to see another day.

Separate in groups of two or three, carry school books, and munch on an apple. Try to look casual and not look menacing. You might see tomorrow.

Putin is after you with a magnifying glass, but don’t keep looking over your shoulders, but keep an eye out, particularly in back of you in some way. Don't use mirrors.

So Vladimir Putin stepped up, and out of his bunker wearing a back suit, announcing that brave Russian soldiers of Mother Russia had stopped the rebellion.

The Brave Russian soldiers of Mother Russia questioned, “Huh? Who us? We didn’t lift a finger. Prigozhin just quit, cut out and went to Belarus. He could have marched all the way to the Kremlin. We would never get in the way of the Wagner Group army. They’re a gang of mercenaries bailed out of jail by Prigozhin; kill or rot in jail.”

Brave Russian soldiers of Mother Russia and not of the Wagner Group, do not surrender your weapons when asked by Putin; get into civilian clothes...

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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