(Remove that comma above, and read the truth!)
Happy people are not good for the economy. When you’re miserable, you drink too much, eat too much, and go on shopping trips buying crap that will sit in the “stuff drawer” forever, or until the next yard sale comes by.
Depressed people are much better. Good for everything the nation needs.
But how to balance the two? Y’see, the thing is: when a person is depressed they may kill themselves. Which means they can’t spend spend spend! The dead are very unreliable!
So how to make people buy tons of shit but also make them happy enough to stay alive and keep buying shit until they die and become shit themselves?
Finally, the Illuminati and government alien forces came up with a plan to save the day!
Enforced illiteracy! And possible future lobotomies, like they did in the 50s when housewives didn’t find life interesting enough by just doing housework for their entire lives.
If people read books, they may become smart and think for themselves. This cannot pass! So if they are no longer taught to read, then they can’t read the official documents and all the fine print when the government takes away more and more of their rights. Instead, they play video games and watch wacky TikTok girls shake their booties and maybe see some funny animals be funny and people on skateboards getting hit in the balls!
That’s entertainment! You don’t even have to think about it! Just go out and get some pork rinds and a case of Pabst Blue Ribbon and sit in your easy chair and laugh til you shit yourself, and the government can wage war against you secretly, and then if you ask questions, you get arrested because you had an “illegal substance” in your possession … a book.
Anyone with a library card will be an “insurgent” or maybe ‘terrorist” or whatever buzzword that means a bad person in this day and age. “Commie” is still fine, but it’s just so old. Now try “socialist”. And if that don’t work, “anarchist” is next. Please do not read about political anarchism, or your brain may rebel.
When the government tells you how to think, just do it. Remember the old Nike saying? Just do it! Obey! Even my running shoes are against me and my rights!
Fuck your rights … buy a new pair of Air Jordans with super awesome pump action and enter to win a free trip to Disneyland Vacation Resort Island, where the Illuminati dresses up like Mickey and Minnie and how in the hell is Goofy NOT an Illuminati “being from another planet”?!
The lobotomy feel cool and refreshing, brain no smart no more, feel good and calm, I calm now and happy … I love the leader, the leader is good, I give my soul to the Big Ill forever!
Let’s all go to Disneyland and keep our mouths shut! Yay for freedom!
