BERN, Switzerland - (Satire News) - A spokesperson for the Swiss government has informed the news media that record-breaking temperatures are being recorded all over "The Land of Chocolate."
The capital city of Bern recently set an all-time record high since the country was first established on August 1, 1291, 731 years ago (116-F, 46.7-C degrees!).
Many Swiss supermarkets report that all of her ice cream, chocolate products, and lipsticks have melted into huge blobs of gunk.
Swiss President Ignazio Cassis, has asked NATO to provide much-needed ice so that some of the ice cream, chocolate, and lipsticks can be saved.
Meanwhile, back in America, the man responsible for the horrendously horrible Trumpapalooza Heat Wave (Trump), insists that the fault lies not with him, but with that Central American brother and sister known as 'El Nino' and 'La Nina.'
