MOSCOW - (Satire News) - Japan's national news agency, Saki News has just broken the story that Putin is getting ready to unleash his communist might on the tiny European country of Belgium.
And according to Belgium's local press the reason is simply because Belgium President Alexander De Croo, has stated that he will be sending 850 pounds of Belgium's finest Brussels Sprouts to the soldiers and the people of the Ukraine.
Putin is reportedly so angry that he actually cut his left wrist with a Swiss Army knife, but luckily one of his girlfriend's saw him and was able to put a turniquet around his wrist.
SIDENOTE: The Kremlin Voice in an effort to cover up Putin's "Self-Cutting" is saying that the ego-maniacal dictator was bitten by a wayward woodchuck
