MOSCOW - (Russian Satire) - The Kremlin Voice has just announced that President Putin has just learned that his invading Russian soldiers have run out of prophylactics (rubbers).
At first the Russian leader said that his troops need to be concerned with fighting the Ukrainians and not with even thinking about boinking (engaging in sexual relations).
One high-ranking field general commented (anonymously of course) that Vlady can talk like a bitch because he has access to hundreds of condoms; including ribbed ones, colored ones, and even glow-in-the-dark ones.
Meanwhile, word coming from the Ukranian government states that the Russian troops are getting their asses kicked in the towns of Vinnafucapoi, Luludova, and the Ramen capital of the world, Pissagovina. ■
