Pentagon's Hummer Laser Gun 'targetting Mexican dope planes'

Funny story written by queen mudder

Monday, 9 February 2009

image for Pentagon's Hummer Laser Gun 'targetting Mexican dope planes'
Psycho-grade strains: the Hummer Laser blitzers will take out these mobsters' 2009 harvest

Tuscon, Arizona - (Sinsemilla Mess): The Pentagon has unveiled its latest high tech weapon against pesky Mexican dope fiends currently flooding California with psycho-grade Acapulco Gold cannabis strains.

Giant Hummer-mounted laser guns capable of vaporising unmanned dope planes are targetting the 2009 early harvest which is being parachuted into sat nav-specific drop offs north of San Diego.

The technology has been developed by Boeing's High-Energy Laser/Electro-Optical Systems, ostensibly for shooting down Iranian surveillance drones in Afghanistan's notorious Tora Bora region.

However recent secret trials at the White Sands Missile Range in New Mexico have proved beyond a shadow of a doubt the advantages of blitzing the dope drones without the usual hassle of hundreds of tonnnes of burning weed dropping out of the sky near schools, parks and fast-food outlets.

Five thousand of the Laser Scavenger dope blasters will now be positioned on the US/Mexican border according to Homeland Insecurity Department sources.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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