Man Tries to Grab Photographer's Tits

Funny story written by Doppelbock

Wednesday, 29 August 2007

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image for Man Tries to Grab Photographer's Tits
But seriously - they were THIS big!

MITCHELL, SOUTH DAKOTA (AP Newsliar) -- A freelance photographer frequently employed by AP Newsliar captured her assailant on film today as the man tried to fondle her fun-bags.

The incident happened this morning in Mitchell, South Dakota as photographer Denise D. Delgengaro (known as "Triple-D" to her friends) was setting up in preparation for coverage of the annual Corn Festival. Ms. Delgengaro, 36, a native of Ta Ta Creek in British Columbia, says this is not the first time she has been the victim of sexual assault.

"It's like I can't even get on a crowded elevator without some guy 'accidentally' brushing up against my boobs," she told this AP Newsliar reporter. "I mean, sheesh, try to have a little restraint... Hey, HELLO, my eyes are UP HERE, asshole. That's it, I'm outta here." Ms. Delgengaro declined to answer further questions.

The unknown assailant is still at large.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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