Religious Times News has reported that not just Trump and Biden have secret documents in their dirty laundry rooms, but older presidents also have a few classified napkins kicking around the tool room, the lounge, the Jacuzzi, the 70s orgy parlour, and elsewhere.
And who would you think had some of the weirdest? The Secret Service, the FBI, the DOJ can’t figure out if this document is bad or good. It was found near a strange painting of this president acting like a little child (cuz he is one deep down?) playing on the Oval Office rug with some crumbled blocks, flying a toy airplane through the air, having just crashed whatever the blocks once built.
That’s right, Mr. “Now Watch This Drive” and Mr. “I Am The Decider” himself … drum roll …
George W Bushwacker!
He had a song written in his own hand (analyzed by experts, possibly Antifa) in crayon, of all things, with what are believed to be “chocolate” stains on it. Experts were able to decipher some of the blurrier words – and heavily corrected the spelling and grammar – to reveal to the world this:
Jesus With A Gun
Jesus with a gun
Is how America won
All her holy wars
Fascist stars and bars
Capitalist theocracy
Is the real democracy
When you’re shootin’ from the hip
Load a religious clip
Jesus with a gun
He’s real real fun
Leaning to the right
Looking for a fight
If you want a war
Jesus will settle the score
Blood and guns
Cross and crutch
Fully-loaded Jesus
Got the killer’s touch
Say your prayers
It’s time to die
All the little Satans
Make baby Jesus cry
Automatic gunfire
Takes me way higher
Love for only Jesus
Kills ‘em all to please us
He didn’t die for you scum
Depends on where you’re from
We’ll always say we won
When Jesus gets his gun
Jesus wants a thrill
Jesus wants a kill
Hunting in my 4X4
Load the pelts then get some more
A heathen’s blood
Ain’t worth a lot
We want a crimson flood
So take the shot
Black or white
Brown or yellow
If you ain’t right
Then don’t say hello
Christ the racist
Will always face it
Stare you down
You fucking clown!
Wow! All those rhymes from Georgie Porgie! His secret talent? His daddy forced him to be prez when he just wanted to sing and play all day … what’s that song? I don’t wanna work, just bang the drum slowly all day?
Yep, G.W. Bushwacker in a nutshell … and we do mean NUT.
