NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – One of Manhattan’s most popular realtors has said that he recently received a text message from an individual who says that he represents the Sand Castle Cartel, which is a part of the Al-Qaeda terrorist group.
Realtor Phillip D. Flasko, 53, told News Blues reporter Velveeta Maracas that the group wants to purchase the Trump Tower, and they will pay cash.
Flasko, stated that the Al-Qaeda rep is named Shan Fu Glu, and he made it abundantly clear that they want to close the deal as soon as possible.
Meanwhile, Donald Trump, has commented that he is willing to sell the building with the stipulation that he gets to keep the top two penthouse floors.
Shan Fu Glu stated that Al-Qaeda will buy Trump Tower immediately, but Trump will not be allowed to keep the two penthouse floors.
When asked why, he was told because Trump has a horrible stigma about him, and also everyone knows that the bastard grabs women by their pussies, he lies out his ass, he’s a racist, and he has a horrendously ugly-looking orange complexion that makes him look like a gigantic tangerine.
[PUBLISHER'S NOTE: True dat on all four counts!].
