Rick Santorum, candidate for president of the United States, tried once again, to walk back some of his controversial statements pertaining to women.
As the press corps looked on in stunned silence, he continued,"And I never said, for every great man, there is a woman washing his underwear! I NEVER said that!"
As journalists looked at each other and squirmed in their seats, Santorum continued unabated, "And, I NEVER said that Mother Teresa was a crack Ho! NO, not one time!"
An Associated Press reporter asked: "But Senator, we have all of these things on video tape. How can you deny it?"
"I can deny it because these events never happened!" He paused, "As God is my Judge!"
"And one final item," Santorum continued, "for those of you in the smarmy left wing, commie, sexually deviant media, my wife walks five paces behind me because she wants to! She says she likes seeing me show my ass in public!"
