The True Dat News Agency reports that a Camden landscaping company has just discovered the existence of a hidden moat at Windsor Castle.
The moat, concealed beneath layers of grass, brush, tree limbs, and a surprising number deceased insects for over 115 years, has finally come to light.
Moat Magicians Ltd. has been awarded the contract by King Charles III to uncover and restore the moat to its original condition.
King Charles III stated that the restoration cost will be astronomical and primarily funded through donations from concerned UK citizens, with a smaller contribution from the Buckingham Palace "Odds and Sods" fund.
Initial excavations of the Windsor Castle moat have yielded a surprising find — a perfectly preserved coprolite, believed to be from the time of Queen Elizabeth I. DNA testing conducted on the ancient fecal matter indicates a strong possibility of it being produced by the iconic monarch herself. Stool analysers have identified the Queen had enjoyed a meal of pickled jellyfish and gilded turnip before laying the turd.
