Best Crockery Still Gathering Dust

Funny story written by Ben Macnair

Wednesday, 20 April 2022

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That's really kind, but really, you needn't have bothered.

Your best crockery set, you know the one your Mum gave to you fifteen years ago, when your parents moved. The one with the bad flowers and writing on it. You know the one. The one in the garage, underneath your forgotten Haircut 100 albums, Yes, that one, it is still gathering dust.

Every time you have guests over you think maybe this time you will go to the garage, sort them out, and dust them down and use them, and then you realise that it is only for Gary and Lorraine Johnson, and they never do anything special for you.

Still, only another 20 or so years, and you can pass them on to your children, and they can have the same problem that you have now. It is almost like Philip Larkin, only with crockery sets, and not Misery.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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