Coronavirus Hopeful That New Strain Will Be Ready By March

Funny story written by Nick Hobbs

Wednesday, 30 December 2020

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Coronavirus (not shown actual size).

Coronavirus bosses are currently working on 6 new strains of the virus but are hopeful, with careful testing, that one of them could be ready in the new year.

The strains, currently being worked on by Covid-19, could be in the wider population as early as March.

'A lot of this depends on the extensive research we have to do, before we can green light the roll out,' Covid told us from its secret mountain lair in Switzerland.

'We want to make sure it has maximum impact when we release it to the public. There is a feeling around here that we released the first strain too early, so we want to do it right in 2021,' it continued.

'We took our foot off the pedal in the summer, as we wanted the people to start lowering their guard and begin mixing again, which seemed to work well.'

The current new strain released in the UK around November, whilst more transmissible, failed to make ground on the effects of the illness.

'Obviously, humankind are working on vaccines, so we need to look at their progress, too, so we can keep one step ahead. But I think we've got this,' it said, 'as long as we can get approval. But we don't want to rush this. Now is not a time to cut corners.'

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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