A Dallas Cowboy cheerleader, Anita Bonita, had a pom-pom malfunction, and three people in the front row were hospitalized.
“I don’t know what happened – it was in my hand one minute, and hurting people the next. I thought pom-poms were our friends?”
Friends can sometimes turn on you, Anita!
The three people were shirtless, large-bellied men painted with the Cowboys colors and logo, all doing a 3-person wave, fat rippling and undulating in a hypnotic manner, their large $30 dollar beers spilling on those fools who had to sit next to them, their $15 taco baskets upended and being dive-bombed by seagulls.
The pom-poms lightly smacked each man in the nose, so they were not to blame.
What was to blame: their injuries came from themselves, blinded, not able to control their wave, bouncing bellies off one another, gurgling frothy beers, farting uncontrollably … and the hot Texas sun beating down, making them sweat.
Their condition was upgraded to stable, from hilarious. They were dehydrated.
This is barely news, but every journalist needs filler.
