The Philadelphia Eagles Defeat The Detroit Lions In The Blizzard Bowl

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 9 December 2013

image for The Philadelphia Eagles Defeat The Detroit Lions In The Blizzard Bowl
A photo of the parking lot at The Eagles Lincoln Financial Field.

PHILADELPHIA - For much of the game between the Philadelphia Eagles and the Detroit Lions, Lincoln Financial Field disappeared underneath the tons of snow that began falling two hours before the start of the game.

Someone asked if magician David Blaine was in the stadium. When the final semi-frozen gun sounded, the Eagles had won the game 34-20 and the snowman making contest as well.

Seven of the Philadelphia cheerleaders had to be taken to the Eagles dressing room to thaw out their pantyhose.

Stadium vendors said that over 2,000 beer drinkers complained that their beers had snow in them. One fan said he ate three hot dogs before he realized that all three were missing the weiner.

Eagles Coach Chip Kelly told Sports Balls Illustrated Daily's Rufus Reno that he could not ever recall having so much snow in his Fruit of The Looms.

The game had to be temporarily halted early in the third quarter after a polar bear wandered onto the snow near the Lions bench.

SIDENOTE: One of the Eagles coaches remarked that at least none of the uniforms would need to be washed.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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