Don’t be a jive turkey! Get yo ass out and see the latest Hollywood blockbuster sure to win the next Best Picture.
“Captain Funk and the Groovy Bringdown”, a Blaxploitation musical coming soon, where pimps and hos keep it real and are always on the run from whitey. Sometimes they win, sometimes they lose, but as long as they sing, it’s all groovy!
Donald Trump says: “This is my kind of movie, it’s real, though I make better movies, I may make a musical myself, I have a great voice, you have to hear me, Melania hears me sing in the shower all the time –”
He went on for another 20 minutes so we cut off his quote.
Kanye West says: “Uh, yeah I ain’t bipolar but I may be autistic and I may be Jesus, who was black but I’m trying hard to be white but people are always against me and if I was in a musical then I could be a musician which I ain’t cuz I know I’m really a KKK member and Herschel is a FBI agent from Texas-Georgia, which is the same state anyway.”
Didn’t understand any of that, so we won’t use it in the promos.
Mitch McConnell says: “I am far too busy to see this movie, but I will see anything with a white Marvel character. My Asian wife loves those, even though I voted against her right to be married to me.”
Ron DeSantis and Marjorie Taylor Greene both had the same quote (strangely): “This movie is grooming children! The KKK loves kids, and dressing up in a white suit and a white hood is good for them, but dressing as a pimp and a hooker – grooming! Groooooooooming!”
This summer, head to your local theatre and see what all the idiots are talking about. Don’t be a bringdown – be a Captain Funk!
