HOLLYWOOD – (Satire News) – There is much sadness in the Land of The Kardashians, as the step-father of Kim, Khloe, and Kourtney (Kardashian), along with Kylie and Kendall Jenner's biological father, has just been dumped.
The highly heartbroken Caitlyn Jenner, formerly Bruce Jenner, has been dumped by his fiancé, Harvey Hacklinquill, 46.
Caitlyn spoke with Papaya Bamboo, a writer for Tabloid Today. She mentioned to Miss Bamboo that everything was going along as fine as Napa Valley wine, when all of a sudden, out of the blue, Harvey told her that he did not want to marry her.
Caitlyn asked him if it was because (she) has such a deep, unlady-like voice. Harvey nodded no.
Jenner then asked him if it was because (she) had much bigger biceps and triceps than him. Again he nodded no.
The former Olympic star then asked if it was because no matter how much makeup (she) puts on (she) still looks like a guy. BINGO!
Harvey replied that he has just always liked for his girlfriends to actually look like females and not like damn fucking muscular, big-veined body builders.
