MONTREAL, Canada – (Satire News) – The Ipso Facto News Agency has confirmed that the Montreal Junior College cheerleaders, known as the Beavers, will in fact appear as contestants on Canada’s version of “America’s Got Talent,” called “Canada’s Got Talent.”
IFNA senior reporter Fuchsia Garfunkel stated that back in August, the head cheerleader of the cheerleading squad suffered an injury to her pubic region when a cheerleading maneuver went horribly wrong.
Joanie Mackinberger required a bit of reconstructive surgery in order to realign her vagina back in the position that it was pre-injury.
She has since totally recovered and Joanie happily told Miss Garfunkel that her hooha has never felt better.
She did note that although her boyfriend, Timmy Titler, broke up with her two days after the injury, she is thrilled to say that she is now dating the school's star defensive tackle YoFron “Sasquatch” Edison.
SIDENOTE: Joanie told Miss Garfunkel that as odd as it may seem, the injury to her camel toe actually helped to make her a much better person, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically and sexually; especially sexually.
