Our reporter conducted an on-site survey of the recent gastronomic offerings at the Beijing Olympic Village. It revealed the following list of Chinese delicacies, tended to by Lin Yee Tang, steam table server extraordinaire and Beijing Sewer Purifica…
Dateline: Trotskyville, Russia -- The recent release of the Putin touted COVID-19 vaccine, named Spudnik 13, sparked our interest and prompted us at Sanitation Watch to send our star reporter, Biff Utrousubrosa, ‘undercover’ into the Madama Blavatsky…
You’ve demanded it, and here it is! We’ve been out scrounging around second-hand elitist boutiques, digging through Deep-State detritus dumps, and raiding the dustbins of those radical trendsetters whose stuff we know you crave. So, don’t delay! O…
With extra time on your hands, formally chronicle all of your ex-spouses’ and former squeezes’ character flaws and physical shortcomings. Pick out the countless years of accumulated crud from your navel. Think about catching up on correspondenc...
In an exclusive interview with Dork Jiggleflab of the Wilmington, DE, “Credit Card Extortion Daily News,” candidate ‘Sleepy Joe’ Biden roused himself from a morning nap long enough to outline some of the key actions he’ll take when he assumes the man...
In a press conference at the Back-Bay Plaza hotel in Boston, putative Presidential candidate Warren proclaimed her definitive genetic link to a historic American tribe. She now affirms, citing Exegesis Genome Testing [EGT], that she is of the Mohica...
Vermont senator and putative Presidential candidate Bernie Sanders was at a loss for “words” last night in this Midwestern Iowa hamlet of “Fly Over Country,” as reported by Dash Scribble, sometime stringer for the Des Moines Daily Manure Times. It...
Close scrutiny of Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s “Green New Deal” reveals the following key provisions, which are hereby provided as public service. The United States shall henceforth be renamed ‘Alexandria’s Fossil Fuel Free Fiefdom’ with Queens, New...
Goozahyurwatchee Swamp, South Carolina – The world’s most famous nuclear mutant-cryptid is back stateside after some months “on the run” here and there and sometime spent in the ever-greening Euro-Zone. We caught up with Godzilla at his campsit...
Back by popular demand! We’ve been busy searching and nabbing the latest gems from your cherished lefty-progressive radicals. And now they’re here online! As always, to ensure you get your share of these treasures, you’ll need to move faster than...
He needs a decent shampoo, rinse, and cut from Vidal Sassoon. He wants Stormy Daniels’ phone number. He wants to be let loose carte blanche in the M&M anchor store in New York City, ending in a candy bath of M&M Reds. He wants his scientists to examine Nancy Pelosi –it’s an ancient Korean cultural practice dealing with living mummification. He’s out of nuclear warheads anyway, cuz Godz...
George Saunders's recent book, Lincoln in the Bardo, recounts how the 16th President spent some time in a Washington cemetery mausoleum after the death of his son Willie, being pestered by quirky ghosts. Yet, this is only the latest in a long line o...
It's long overdue, but it's here now on your screen! More exclusive stuff from your favorite website for lefti-progressive memorabilia and prized totems of coastal-elitist craving. You'll want to add all these choice gems to your elegant display ca...
Recent examination answers from U. S. high school students again demonstrate their ongoing mastery of American history and the effectiveness of U. S. secondary education. Here is a sample selection of the best answers. George Washington got the P...
As a public service, the Alliance for Millennial Entitlement and Legitimacy has recently issued a definitive list of those core characteristics which describe this confident, great generation. The official list of Millennial Core Characteristics follows: Their multi-tasking prowess is asserted by tokeing joints while texting and fiddling with piercings when on the freeway at speed. Video ga...
Acclaimed by the Lobotomized Millennial Weed-Head Alliance as the "most awesomely awesome TV viewing gig!" Cited by the World Linguistics Congress as presenting the most meaningful use of "Shit" as an expression of the central character's deepest...
Tax filing deadlines are on the horizon. As is the yearly tradition at the National Institute of Slick and Slidey Tax Prep Jockeys, we are providing our annual listing of often forgotten income tax pointers and preparation tips. As always, we are n...
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