It seems as though the Attorney General of the United States, Merrick Garland, may have cold feet. While resembling the nervous Don Knotts, Mr. Garland proudly announced that after one whole year, his Justice Department has arrested and convicted ove…
Ah, Robert Mueller. Up until now, he’s been the focus of many as “a savior”. Hardworking and diligent, a believer in justice with no desire for fame or fortune and who, up until recently, never said a word about his investigation. Here’s what h...
Fresh from exchanges on the floor of Congress, last night Representative Trey Gowdy (R-SC) and Attorney General Rod Rosenstein further mixed it up at a watering hole in the back streets of Washington D.C. The two met by accident at "Hooters With M...
Debbie Wasserman Schultz was head of the Democratic National Committee (DNC) who devised a limited debate schedule for the Clinton-Sanders primary contest. She also scheduled the debates to be held at a time when viewing would be limited. All of t...
WASHINGTON, DC - The Justice Department is preparing to bring a lawsuit against polar bear conservationists Polar Bear Lovers over a pattern of racially discriminatory tactics. Attorney General Eric Holder said this week he expects to announce the...
Washington -- Bra and panty emporium Victoria's Secret is combining with the Secret Service to create the most secret organization that the world has ever known. "We are doubly secret, which makes us twice as secret than any other entity in the un...
Washington DC - Under mounting pressure to disclose more details about the government's Fast and Furious gun-running fiasco, Attorney General Eric Holder revealed today that the effort failed because a "drug tracking" component of the operation was n...
In the witch hunt of the summer, the Bush Justice Department has turned into a Salem Crucible. At the center of the trials stands one cute blonde necromancer, Monica "Goodie" Goodling. Accusations against her involve her use of the dark Rovian powers...
The Road to Hell, the US Justice Department says, is paved with terrorist prevention. Letters released this week from the US Justice Department advise that if the motive is the prevention of terrorism, any and all means are Justice Dept justified.
US Senate members pulled an all-nighter yesterday, complete with all-dressed Godfather's pizzas, Krispy cremes with sparkles (and in an ethnic salute to new-found friend India) Big Gulp Mango Chutney Squeegies.
WASHINGTON D.C.--(NOBSDCNOOZ) Attorney General Alberto Gonzales insisted yesterday he had only a small role in the dismissal of eight federal prosecutors. Disbelieving senators reacted calling the Attorney General a "gre...
WASHINGTON -- The remaining employees of the United States Department of Justice submitted their resignations yesterday, becoming the third-ranking through the 35,473rd-ranking Justice Department aides to quit in the aftermath of the firings of eight...
The freedom of speech case Morse vs. Frederick involving high school student rights has come to the attention of U.S. Attorney General Alberto R. Gonzales.
The President has been outed. Licitly split, wham bang, like grease lighting, zoom, the White House has asked the Justice Department to begin an investigation to uncover the squealer, snitch, traitor who leaked President George W. Bush's thirty o...
The United States Justice Department has launched a probe to investigate the recent manufacture and usage of questionable bullet proof vests. These vests were purchased by the federal government and were used in cases by high ranking government offi...
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