Well hello there, Michael Madeup here again. I know that it is now April, but I thought I would let you know about my new year's message. I know it is four months too late, but a busy politician always has far more pressing things to do than to ta…
Hello, Michael Madeup here again, you know me. You must. I say a few things on Twitter. Fairly useless MP for a small city in the middle of nowhere. I have the hair..... Oh, now you know me. Anyway, as I was saying when I supported Boris Johns…
Record collector Randy Scroggins told his wife of 47 years that this year was going to be the year where he gave up listening to atonal jazz because it made him look more intellectual and he has already broken his resolution. 'To be fair, it was n…
(The little diapered Baby of 2024 looked into his crystal ball and saw some of the stories of 2024.) Trump will do something Outrageous every month - Craves Attention like a drug addict craves his 'stash'. He also has to Pick a Vice Presiden…
The Vikings of Scandinavia (are there any others?) have stated that next year will be known as The Year of the Berserker. (The Chinese have been naming years long enough, it’s time for someone else to try.) That berserk warrior who cannot be conta…
Maurice McSporrin has been dusting down his bagpipes and preparing himself for the one time he plays it at New Year. The bagpipe, with its slight hole in the bellows, and a chanter that doesn't always work properly has been in Maurice's family for…
Well hello there, How did you see in 2022? Were you at a party with some colleagues from Number 10? Were you busy throwing pieces of Coal into your neighbour’s gardens, like they do in Scotland? Or like a few people, did you go to bed at 10? Ha…
A meeting in a small firm lasted three hours, the longest meeting of the year, but also the shortest one in its history, due to the lack of Sue from Accounts. Bunty McClintock, who works in reception said ‘It was the first meeting of 2022, and sur…
As people across the country are starting their new year diets, one woman has found a hilarious and original way to eat chocolate and stick to her diet by posting on Fakebook 'Look everyone, having my five a day, LOL' accompanied by a photo of a half…
The best thing about 2021? Donald Trump is out of the White House. The worst thing about 2021? Donald Trump nearly succeeded in destroying U.S. Democracy. He came close. He and his cronies worked their collective tails off with desperate back…
As millions of Brits are feeling flabby after the Christmas break, one man has taken the revolutionary step of announcing his new fitness regime. Kevin Sponge, 46, said, 'Yes, I know I've said this every year since 2004, but this time it's going t…
There were furrowed brows and anxious looks from behind twitching curtains in one man's neighborhood last night, after a major disturbance in the locality caused residents to wonder just what the hell was going on. The incident happened just befor…
2020 has been seen leaving a hotel room in Bristol, after a suspected secret meeting with 2021. This worrying turn of events has sparked panic across the world, as leaders race to find out what 2020 is planning next. Stock markets are plunging an…
Frustrated at finding himself yet again scrambling at the end of the year to come up with a New Year's resolution worthy of his sincere intention, Edwin Wallace of Nashville, Tennessee, abandoned the quest for this year, but vowed to come up with a t...
It's been reported by a Neighbourhood Community Vigilante Action Group in Sheffield, South Yorkshire, that a family on the city's Woodhouse Estate have already put up Christmas decorations outside their house - despite there still being more than 362...
As 2019 slowly, but surely, approaches its conclusion, and we get ever nearer to another new year, it's been noticed that next year - 2020 (twenty-twenty) - will contain the individual digits' lowest total since nine years ago, in 2011. It will al...
For years it has been one of the most exclusive and sought-after private venues in the world. Next month, Sir Elton John will be opening up his rectum for a New Years Eve concert to remember, featuring the Birmingham Philharmonic Orchestra. Conduc...
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